Todd and our Boy |
These past few weeks we have suddenly seen progress with the adoption of Joseph. After the unfortunate death of our lawyer last fall, things definitely were slowed. For the longest time, things appeared to have stagnated. Three hours after returning home from a surprise anniversary getaway which we were so grateful for, we got a call from our adoption agent stating that our hearing would be in Jinja, Uganda within 2 days. We were quite stunned by this, but had already been prepared by Myriam, our adoption agent that we might be given a phone call with a very short lead time. We just didn’t expect it to be this short. Myriam knew we could not be in country that quickly, (the flight time can take two days) but explained that our Ugandan lawyer would represent us in court and they would go ahead and bring Joseph and the witnesses. We could then coordinate a day the following week when one of us could meet the judge in person.
When the hearing was complete, we were told that the judge was very favorable of our case and sympathetic with Joseph’s condition, but wanted to meet me (Todd) in person. This was a bit of a surprise, as we expected Molly to be the one to go (since Ugandans usually see the mother as the primary care-giver). However, since my name was first on the petition, she wanted to meet with me.
Thanks to the help of a great travel agent, we were able to get tickets within the needed time frame. But before leaving, we were able to attend the Refresh conference – an amazing weekend conference for foster and adoptive parents. During these three days, we heard some raw stories of challenge and redemption. We loved the fact that people were brutally honest with their lives. There were also classes on parenting which applied to both biological and adopted children. On our last night there, we walked out with people praying over us, cheering us on (as they do for all the attendants). The time was – well, refreshing.
As mentioned above, we both had expected Molly to be the one to travel for the hearing. I had to juggle my schedule a bit to make it work. Over the course of the past few months, I have had more of the “how are we going to make this work?” questions that come to mind. Having five children, one with disabilities requires a lot of effort. Now, as we look to taking in Joseph, those questions filled my head all the more.
Edith and Todd in front of the new building many of you contributed to! |
This disparity between the cultures is all the more pronounced when you consider raising a child with special needs. Because of poor public health, many mothers have traumatic births, leading to many of the disabilities seen at Home of Hope (cerebral palsy, hydrocephalus, etc). Most of the children at Home of Hope have been abandoned, as in the case of Joseph. Once a baby is recognized as not being healthy, he is quickly seen as much more of a burden than any other child. In a world, where you must struggle to survive, a child with disabilities is not just a threat to your lifestyle, but a threat to your survival. This is one of the reasons why Edith’s story is so powerful in the formation of Home of Hope. This reality doesn’t make their choice to give up their baby excusable, but it does give some explanation.
While we know our lives will be significantly changed when Joseph comes to live with us, we also feel God has called us to this point in the journey. Yes, this is a sacrifice of our lifestyle (not our survival, as it is for many Ugandans), and in reality a very small compromise compared to many around the world who choose to follow Jesus.
Molly’s Update on 4/4
Todd, Patricia the lawyer, Edith and the Judge |
At this point we have been told that the judge will give an oral ruling on April 23 and a written ruling soon after that. If it is favorable, Joseph will officially be ours, and we will be able to move forward with obtaining a passport, starting the immigration papers and are hopeful to have him home this summer. If not, we are trying to hold everything with an open hand and trust that God will lead when the time comes.
We both have felt with the length of time this has taken and with the many visits back and forth that God has been reminding us that He is in control and that this is not something we need to push. We need to trust Him to do His work and accept whatever outcome He brings. In the last few months we have been trying to be open handed with our future as well as Joseph’s and are putting it into His hands.
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