Merry Christmas 2024

Merry Christmas!

From the Merry Family

2024

Merry Christmas, Family and Friends!  We hope this letter finds you and yours happy and well.  We are thankful for this season to reflect on God’s goodness to us, rest and enjoyable time together.

“For to us a child is born, to us a Son is given, and the government will be on his shoulders.  And he will be called Wonderful Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace” Isaiah 9:6

I think we can all agree this has been a year of ups and downs.  While we have all had some challenges in 2024, we still have much to be thankful for.  Our responses to life’s challenges determines more about us than the challenges themselves.

Probably the highlight of everyone’s year was Ethan and Maggie’s wedding.  Though Maggie was younger than we had expected when she got married, we saw God’s hand on the whole process.  We’ve known Ethan since he was about 10 years old and the older he got and the more we got to know him, the happier we became about having him as a son in law.  Their youth did give us pause but when they talked about wanting to marry, we made a list of some things we wanted to see happen first in their lives, and we were so thankful for the way they honored us by going through and accomplishing the things we asked before they got married.  They have a beautiful story of God doing some surprising things to show both of them his will for them to be together.  Feel free to ask about it because we love to tell it.

Their wedding was deeply emotional for everyone in the family.  The way that you can feel both deep sadness and great joy is beyond explanation.  As the day of the wedding moved closer, there were tears from just about every member in the family.  Even Joseph, using his eye gaze device said, “Maggie come here” in the last few days before the wedding.  He proceeded to use his eyes to flip the camera around and take a selfie of the two of them.  Maggie even took some time off work the week of the wedding, just to come home and be with us.  

At the rehearsal when Maggie’s choice of “I love you Lord” was played as she walked down the aisle, I don’t think there was a dry eye in the room.  When she first played this song for me (Molly) it meant so much to me that her desire was to honor and glorify God even as she walked down the aisle.

There were so many parts of their wedding that was both deeply meaningful, emotionally and spiritually, and yet the celebration afterwards was so.much.fun!  Maggie and Ethan know how to party.  Maggie is one of the most full-of-life people you will ever ever meet and her instructions to all her people were that they better be out there dancing!  She brings sunshine into the room.  Usually at a wedding the dance floor has a few people dancing and most people sitting around the edges of the room watching.  Ethan and Maggie brought the party and one of my (Molly's) favorite parts was seeing all my best mom-friends, instead of just the regular teens and twentysomethings dancing up a storm and celebrating hard.  I love our long history of friendship and that they were there to celebrate!  I am so thankful for all the family and friends who came and made it a priority.  

For both Todd and I it was honestly one of the happiest days of our lives, being so deeply fulfilling watching our girl love and serve God with all of her heart, marry the man she’d been hoping for for a long time and have so much fun in the process.  I love how God is a God of celebration and happiness.  Jesus was both a “man of sorrows” and “anointed with joy above his companions”.  There were some tears and angst leading up to Maggie and Ethan’s relationship and to see God fulfill our dreams and Maggie’s at the same time was just deeply joyous.  We love Ethan and his family and so many people rejoiced over their union.  We were truly overflowing with thanks and praise to God for what he had done.

We are thankful for what God did through this and have fallen into a new rhythm and new normal in which Maggie is not home, but thankful we usually see her several times a week.   Todd has instituted Sunday afternoons as an open invitation for us all to spend time eating and being together and we take advantage of it often.  I have loved watching how each one of our kids values time all together as a family even more than they did before.

Here’s an update on the Merry fam, starting with the shortest…

Vivien (10 years old) is now a fourth-grader at Kennydale Elementary (same school Todd went to as a kid).  Vivien continues to grow more aware of the world around her and has even started to help with dressing herself.  She gets stronger daily.  Her health has been really good and she has finally started to put on some healthy weight thanks to one of the caregivers tweaking her food.  Vivien also has an amazing paraeducator at school who genuinely cares well for her and loves to see her thrive.  Vivien is also blessed with some wonderful caregivers who do so much for her at home.

Joseph (11 years old) As I (Todd) write this, I’m here with Joseph at Seattle Children's.  He’s had some problems with his baclofen pump and is scheduled for surgery in two days.  As always, he has a good attitude and charms the nurses with his smiles.  Joseph has done especially well in communicating through his eye-gaze machine.  He has demonstrated how alert he is to his surroundings. His biggest joy is hanging out with his siblings.  They love him so well and you can tell he loves to be in the center of the activity.  Joseph also has an amazing paraeducator at school who has patiently helped him along with his health ups and downs.  Joseph has also started his second year at AWANA and loves it.  His friend and caregiver Catie does amazing work with him in helping him memorize the verses and play games every Wednesday.  He and Todd have also joined the greeting team at our church.  He has his own nametag and lanyard and he hands out smiles and fist bumps to those coming into church.  He also got to go to Disneyland for his birthday this year and even conquered Space Mountain!

Iva (12 years old) is our resident home-body (second only to Todd).  A natural introvert, she loves her fantasy books, “chillin” with the family and asking when we will see Maggie next.  This past year, Iva began taking weekly horse-riding lessons at a farm in Maple Valley thanks to a wait list that came through.  Her instructors are really good and she has the opportunity to try several different horses (Milkman is one of her favorite).  Iva continues to hone her writing skills.  She especially loves to write stories that involve horses.  Over the summer, she bought a Cintiq tablet to continue to work out her gift as an artist.  She has done especially well as a graphic artist and is especially taking after Maggie in this way.  She has also been very involved with pro-life outreach once a week and has been asking to do it more times a week. She loves listening online to pro-life advocates and learning more about how to help babies and mamas.

Lucie (14 years old) has officially started high school!  She has stepped into the Rhetoric program at co-op and has really done well.  The workload is much heavier than she had been used to, but she has risen to the occasion well.  Our social girl especially loves the group of friends she has found there.  She also enjoys discipleship groups at church.  Lucie is practicing her future parenting skills on her dog “Sophie”, who can be found following Lucie around the house.  Lucie loves being in the nursery with the babies each week and church.  Her babysitting enterprise is growing and she is a natural with young kids and babies.  Lucie is a giver and is looking for any jobs to help pay off her Christmas gifts!  She is also really enjoying taking voice lessons from a wonderful worship leader at our church and has written some poems and songs.  She is also involved in American Heritage Girls and has earned lots of badges this year, working on service projects and personal goals.

Silas (17 years old) is officially a senior at Bellevue College (Running Start).  Silas has done well with his studies but is looking forward to being done next Spring.  He is an entrepreneur at heart and is always thinking through a new money-making idea.  Earlier this year Ethan and Maggie started a Bible study at their house and Silas enjoys helping lead and facilitate along with some of their other friends.  The study has grown since they began and has become a weekly event that many look forward to.  It has been awesome to see Silas’ spiritual growth and love for God’s word.  He’s a smart man and has a heart to show God’s love to others.  Silas has also been working at Backflows Northwest (with his sister and brother-in-law) and loves it!  He is still very involved in pro-life work weekly.  He is still very interested in evangelism as well.  He can also be found at his piano and computer composing new songs and putting arrangements together.

Maggie and Ethan were married on April 26th. What a beautiful event!  This was an emotional event for us all (I Todd especially - lots of ugly crying).  Their ceremony had so much depth, spiritual fervor and joy.  The dancing afterward was epic!  The happy couple are doing well.  They both work full-time at Backflows Northwest (such a great company).  Ethan completed the volunteer fire academy at Buckley FD and has just completed EMT class as well.  He is testing with as many fire departments as he can and looks forward to starting his career in the near future.  Thankfully, we still get to see a lot of M&E and enjoy the weekly Bible study at their house.  They are both very involved in pro-life work and usually Maggie is able to volunteer weekly.

Molly still loves traveling with every member of her family that she possibly can.  This year Molly, Lucie, their awesome caregiver Catie and Edith who runs Home of Hope - got to take Joseph to Disneyland.  Molly counts it in one of the top hardest things she’s ever done, but also so fun and fulfilling.  It was definitely a challenge but Joseph got to go on so many rides and loved Disneyland.  She was able to take several trips with Todd and the other kids as well this year.  This year was her first year of being the primary person in the family teaching co-op instead of Todd.  She loves her class of 4th and 5th graders at co-op.  Prep work isn't her favorite but thankfully it is history and it’s actually kind of fun to have an excuse to dig deeper into the likes of Abraham and Mary Lincoln, Florence Nightingale and Thomas Edison.  She and her BFF Rebecca are triple involved this year, teaching as a team at co-op, helping lead a Troop of Pioneers and Patriots at American Heritage girls and facilitating d-(discipleship) groups at church with the senior girls.  Molly’s love for teenagers continues to grow and she loves hanging out with all of her girls, plus the THM kids as well.  Iva begged to get involved with pro-life outreach and Todd's condition was that Molly go along so Molly has been going weekly with the kids, praying for and trying to support mamas and babies outside of abortion clinics. She is still running three days a week, hiking, writing and spending time with her mom friends as much as she possibly can.

I (Todd) really enjoyed some time away with Molly.  The longer we go in marriage, the more we realize we need time away to connect.  Work, health issues with the kids and lots going on at home can pull us apart.  The times we’ve gotten away have been life-saving for our marriage and we are grateful for the grandparents and caregivers who help so much at home.  I continue to work at King County Medic One, and volunteer on the board of Home of Hope.  Joseph and I have recently joined the greeting team at church and I love watching him make people smile.

Thank you for taking the time to “catch up” with us.  We love getting your letters and hearing updates from you all.

Blessings to your family,

The Merrys

(wedding photos by The Juliet)

Merry Christmas Letter 2023

Merry Christmas! 2023

Merry Christmas, Family and Friends! It seems each year, Christmas comes a bit earlier. Maybe it’s commercialization, or covid. Either way, we love this season of rest, time with family and reflecting back on the year.

“She shall bear a son, and you shall call his name Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins” Matthew 1:21

We know this year has been both a blessing and a challenge for many. Still, we have much to be thankful for. Our world seems to be getting more and more restless. As Augustine said “You have made us for yourself, O Lord, and our heart is restless until it rests in you.” So much in life is taking the restlessness we feel back to Him.

Here’s an update on our clan, starting with the youngest…

Vivien (9 years old) is now in the third grade at Kennydale Elementary. Both she and Joseph moved schools this year and we are thankful for her paraeducator who moved with her. Vivien’s awareness of others seems to have blossomed this year. We have found her much more aware of her surroundings and eager to give smiles to anyone walking by. Her love for balloons is in full swing. As she has gotten stronger, we find that they are lasting only a day or so before they are so beat up and deflated! We are thankful for her caregivers that really do love and care for her so well.

Joseph (10 years old) has really gotten tall this past year! He loves to ride the bus to school, go for walks and be in the middle of any crowd. This past year, he went to Seaside and Wild Waves, spent a few days at Maggie Lake, went to the zoo, took field trips around the city, and had plenty of other adventures. He got to go to an early Seahawks game and his friend Bryan Mone from the Seahawks invited him to Spring training. Earlier this year, Joseph had a baclofen pump installed, which has significantly helped out with his spastic movements. He is more relaxed and seems to be more comfortable as well. He has been “talking” with his eye gaze computer and though he is still learning, he figured out how to make jokes to get others to laugh!

Iva (11 years old) continues to be happiest at home. While she is often found reading books, she has also become quite versed in the world of “Star Stables” where players ride their horses around a whole other world, have races and even do dressage (a formal style of horse riding). In real life, she has also been helping care for and ride a friend’s horse named Stitch. We are thankful for the kindness of her sweet friend who shares Stitch with her every other Wednesday! Iva also stepped up into Logic class at our co-op and has been “finding her voice” with her classmates in debates and discussions. Shs is turning into a blossoming writer. In addition, she begged to join Maggie, and Silas in pro-life work and so she and Molly have started volunteering with them and Iva loves it.  She has passed Molly up height wise even though she is 11 so she is going to be a tall girl!

Lucie (13 years old) is most often seen with her dog “Sophie” following her around. Lucie has proved to be an amazing Dog Mom and is eager to tell anyone just how fantastic Sophie is. Lucie’s favorite weekly activity is co-op, where she loves the discussions and time with friends. She is in popular demand as a babysitter, loves her time with babies and kids and works every week in the nursery at church. She has also done some dog-sitting. In November, Lucie got to experience Uganda for the first time with Todd and Maggie! It really was an amazing trip together and though it was a bit stressful, I (Todd) really am thankful we could experience it together. I love seeing the kids experience a whole new world and a very different culture. Those trips really are eye-opening for us all.

Silas (16 years old) just bought his first truck! He has been working hard at both Highlands Community Church and Chick-fil-a. He’s excited about his new sense of freedom. He also just started Running Start at Bellevue College. He has a full load of classwork and seems to be balancing it well with his time at work. He's still very involved in evangelism and pro-life work and recently got to visit and hold one of the babies that they helped save. This summer we tried to take our boat out as much as we could and Silas especially has skilz on the boat tube.

Maggie (19 years old) just got engaged! We are excited for both she and Ethan, as they have been friends since the fourth grade. Seeing their relationship grow to this point has been a joy. They are looking forward to getting married next year. Maggie continues to be very involved in evangelism and the pro-life movement and recently got the news that one of the babies they helped save was born on her birthday. It was a beautiful birthday present. She loves spending time with friends. She is working full time at Backflows Northwest. She has finished Running Start at Bellevue and gotten her AA.

Ethan (Maggie’s fiancé) has known our family since he was young and we have watched him grow into a strong, wise man who loves Jesus. He also works full time at Backflows Northwest and is in the fire academy and volunteering with hopes to become a firefighter. He loves the outdoors, hiking, playing guitar, healthy food and Maggie! He is also passionate about pro-life work.  We are so thankful he will become a part of our family next year and are excited for their life together.

Molly is loving the teenage phase of parenting and our house is usually hopping with their friends. The secret to getting your teenagers to do things with you is to invite their friends everywhere. Molly has done quite a bit of hiking, both with Todd and with the teens and enjoys traveling anytime she can. Sedona with Todd was a huge highlight as well as the beaches of the Olympic Peninsula, Colchuck Lake and Mount Storm King. With the teens she enjoyed, Sage Hills Loop in wildflower season, Deception Pass, Mt. Elinor, Hurricane Ridge, Fort Worden and Fort Casey. Her sister Anna invited her on a trip in May and she enjoyed the beauty of Cabo and reconnecting with her. Photography is her hobby and joy on these trips, and she still loves reading, writing and journaling as often as she can. American Heritage Girls, Co-op, doctor’s appointments, scheduling, managing caregiving, caring for Joseph and Vivien and driving kids around keeps her busy. She also loves connecting with her d-group girls every Sunday night at church.

I (Todd) really enjoyed time away with Molly in Sedona, Arizona in February. The scenery was beautiful and we did some great hikes. This year, family time at Maggie Lake was especially good, as we had a good chunk of time there and I was able to do some projects with my Dad. Silas and I had a great camping trip over the summer, and I loved the time with Maggie and Lucie in Uganda. I’m very thankful for the time we have with the kids. I am still working at King County Medic One, and keeping busy on the boards of Home of Hope and His HIS co-op.

Thank you for taking the time to “catch up” with us. We love getting your letters and hearing updates from you all.  Molly's facebook or instagram have a lot more photos so feel free to browse through our year.

Jesus came to bring the kingdom of heaven to us here on earth by his death and resurrection when we see our sin for what it is and choose to follow HIm. The kingdom of God is righteousness, peace and joy in the Holy Spirit. We love pursuing these things and have been thinking about and meditating on the truth that all three need to go together for true fulfillment, with the help of the Holy Spirit. True life is found in pursuing these things and not placing one above another. The pursuit of happiness or joy is not fully found without living righteously in the Holy Spirit. But trying to be righteous without accessing joy and peace leads to burnout and discouragement.

Jesus came to bring LIFE. We are so thankful for the Holy Spirit’s help as we pursue a beautiful life of righteousness, peace and joy at Christmas. We feel so grateful for the life He has given us. Our prayer is that you experience this too!

Blessings to your family,

The Merrys

Merry Christmas Letter 2022

 Merry Christmas!

Hello Family and Friends!  

We hope this Christmas season finds you joyful and well.  We are blessed to have you in our lives, even if we don’t see each other all that often.  This Christmas season, we are reminded that…

“She shall bear a son, and you shall ca
ll his name Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins” Matthew 1:21

As it may be with you, 2022 brought its share of challenges and joys.  Still, we are thankful for the peace in the middle of the challenges.   

In April we were able to take a long-dreamed of family vacation to Maui.  All of the older kids were able to come, though we only had a couple of nights where everyone was able to be all together because of the needs of Joseph and Vivien we were still so thankful for a chance to get away and enjoy beautiful Hawaii.

Here’s an update on our clan, starting with the youngest…

Vivien (8 years old) is now in the second grade at Hazelwood Elementary.  She loves riding the bus to school and back each day (although she will be the first to tell you she doesn’t like early mornings!)  Viv’s giggles and her bouncing balloons bring a happy note to the house.  We are thankful for her caregivers who help out in so many ways.  She also has a wonderful para-educator, teachers and therapists who do so many fun things with her.    

Joseph (9 years old) is becoming a young man!  He is now in his third wheelchair as he has grown so much.  Mr. Social also loves going to school and hanging out with any crowd.  We are in the middle of some tests at Seattle Children’s which will hopefully lead to him having a Baclofen pump installed.  This will make him so much more comfortable as well as make it easier to manage him.  Again, we are so thankful for his caregivers, paraeducator, therapists and teachers!

Iva (10 years old) continues to be our happy homebody.  Iva is often found curled up on a couch with a book.  Some of Iva’s favorite books this past year were Story Thieves and The Hero’s Guide to Saving the Kingdom.    This year, she started a computer programming class, Taekwondo, as well as a cooking class at Heritage!  Iva has also gotten quite good at whipping up a batch of slime (just in case you need any).  A highlight of her year was a trip to Zion and Bryce Canyon!  She, Lucie and friends went on some fun hikes and made lasting memories,
    

Lucie (12 years old) will tell you that the best part of her year was getting her little Cavapoo “Sophie”, who just turned one year-old (and yes, Lucie threw a party for her).  Lucie loves her friends in Logic class and is always trying to get them together for events.  When she’s not doting on Sophie, she is usually found on the swing set in the backyard, listening to her music.    Lucie has been expanding her role as babysitter and is usually eager to help out with Vivien and Joseph in a pinch.  Her caring nature is a quality we are all thankful for
.

Silas (15 years old) has been driving with his permit!  This is his last year as a “homeschool” student, as he will step into Running Start at Bellevue College next year.  He has been busy working at out church (Highlands Community) about 10 hours a week, doing various maintenance tasks.  He has been hoping to pick up some more hours as he works toward eventually buying his own car.  Silas is often found on his keyboard upstairs, pounding out some new tunes.  He was able to play for the Highschool worship team at church, and his hoping for some more opportunities.  This past summer, Silas went on an internship with Tiny Heartbeat Ministries, a pro-life ministry in Moscow, Idaho.  He loved the feeling of independence and the friendships he formed while there.  He plans to go on the Justice Ride in Ohio again this next Spring.  

Maggie (18 years old) is finishing up her last few quarters in Running Start at Bellevue College.  This past summer, she bought her first car, which she lovingly named “Chuck”.  With her car came a growing independence, as she is quite the socialite.   She enjoys her work at Backflows Northwest in the office. She also helps lead a team on Thursdays to do pro-life work at a nearby abortion clinic and loves when babies are saved and mamas are supported and loved.

Molly continues to spend time with family and friends, write, jog, hike and travel whenever she can.  She helps lead sophomore discipleship groups at church and is loving the teenage years with her kids.  Todd says she is stuck in the teens herself so she relates.  She enjoyed short trips with Maggie (to Palm Springs) and Silas (to Knotts Berry Farm), as well as a trip with Lucie and Iva to Zion National park with their BFFs..  She attends lots of timeshare presentations and uses travel card points  to get free nights to support her travel habit.  She and Todd were able to get away for a few nights for their anniversary to hike at the beautiful Columbia River gorge area.  Managing Joseph and Vivien’s medical needs, with doctors appointments, therapists and scheduling caregivers keeps her hopping.  Last but not least, she has enjoyed teaching Bible at HIS co-op this year and digging into the Word to try to make it relevant to the wonderful kids she gets to teach

Todd has been busy keeping up with the rest of the family.  His homeschooling load has been lightened a bit as Molly has been doing most all the schoolwork with Iva.  He has enjoyed some fun projects around the house such as building a carport finishing up Viv and Joe’s bedroom remodel.  This last May he celebrated 23 years in the fire service.  He’s grateful every day for the opportunity to work with some great people while helping those in need.

This year, at the beginning of the year Todd asked God about a word for the year.  He was prompted to think about the word “sustainable”.  Molly was in wholehearted agreement with asking God for sustainability in life.  The last few years have felt so dramatic and times, with the ups and downs of the adoption and caring for medical needs.  Thankfully we have been able to obtain some more caregiving hours for Joseph and Vivien which has made life feel a little more sustainable.  We are thankful to God for His sustaining grace, His sustaining provision and a life that has moved from “almost out of control” to “only somewhat crazy at times”, which feels a little better!  We are grateful for a God who sustains us.

Thank you for taking the time to “catch up” with us.  We love getting your letters and hearing updates from you all.

Blessings to your family,

The Merrys

A real trip to Hawaii, Idols and Good Gifts

I have been reflecting on our recent trip to Hawaii, our trip home from Hawaii in December and a trip I took with Silas and Maggie and one of their friends for SIlas’s birthday.  I love / sometimes don’t love the truth of the Bible that God says He is a “jealous God”.  I love / sometimes don’t love the fact that He doesn’t want anything to come between Him and us and our love.  He is personal.  He arranges circumstances to remind us of this at times.  I have known for a while that he has been putting his finger the trips and vacations in my life and asking me to submit them to him and be careful not to make them idols.

With Todd and I coming home from our Hawaii trip in December we wondered if we should move forward with our Hawaii trip that we had planned with the kids this April.  After recovering from covid and evaluating my mom’s health, Joseph and Vivien’s health and the caregivers we had, we went back and forth about what we should do.

Todd offered to stay home and let me go alone with all the kids for the full time, but his Dad and Step-Mom were coming and I wanted him to be able to enjoy the experience and the time with them.  I could have sent him with the kids with him and stayed home but after praying and wishing and hoping and dreaming for a Hawaii experience with the kids for years, that might have sent me over the edge.  

We thought about canceling the whole thing as well but in the end, we decided that Todd and I would take the younger girls for the first week as planned and then he would go home for the second week instead of staying and letting my mom take care of the girls.  The younger two would go home with him, Maggie and Silas would join me and I would get to stay the whole time.  In return for this, when summer came, he would be the one to go to Seaside and Maggie Lake, our regularly planned trips and I would stay home with Joseph and Vivien only coming for a small amount of the time that we could get caregivers and use respite hours.

We were thinking about having my mom come to Hawaii, but it was complicated as Silas was planning on participating in a speech tournament and she was going to stay with the younger girls.  At the last minute, with his decision to do a summer internship a few weeks later and life getting busy, he decided to pass on the speech tournament and stay in Hawaii for the full week.  

This enabled Todd to be home full time for the second week instead of traveling with Silas, which freed up my Mom to come along with Maggie and Silas, thanks to Maggie’s suggestion - with one day's notice.  My mom is the queen of spur of the moment spontaneity, quickly pivoted and packed.  She was thrilled, we were thrilled and it worked out perfectly to have her there with Maggie, SIlas, Richard, Linda and I.

Details aside, we truly had a great time while we were there and I loved exploring the beautiful Island of Maui with the kids and Todd.  The rooms we booked were gorgeous and peaceful and huge and thanks to our timeshare I got a pretty super deal that felt both luxurious and relaxing.

Before we’d adopted Joseph, one of the last vacations we took was a trip with the whole family including Vivien was one of the most meaningful to me.  I loved being with the kids and grandparents, everything went smoothly, we connected well.  I know that everyone loves vacations - but I’m a little extra in this department.

Todd has often joked that “Hawaii” is the other man in my life.  I run the vacation portion of our budget, attend a lot of timeshare presentations to get free stays, use air miles and credit card reward points and squeeze every bit out of our allotment as I possibly can.  I love vacations because my love language is time and I love having the kids to myself for a whole week.  My personality is also one that loves exploring and adventure and vacations can be full of this as well.

I admit that trips and vacations can definitely be an idol in my life.  And I feel like lately God has reminded me, without being too harsh or completely taking them away, that my focus needs to be renewed, things of the earth will not satisfy and I need, as always, to hold things I love with an open hand.  I need to put vacations in their proper place.

First of all I always think that no matter how stressful it is to plan, a trip is worth it despite the hassle.  But this trip, with three caregivers, different schedules, different types of hours (personal and respite) and all of the airline and hotel and car plans - took literally hours and hours of planning for weeks ahead of time.  

There were parts that were stressful even after we got there, because of phone calls and questions from home and school.  There were hiccups, phone calls from the caregivers who needed to switch shifts and emails to the case managers to fix and change some of the hours. 

I was managing things from afar some of the time and as the first week went by Joseph was having some trouble with vomiting, after going months with no issues.  By the time Todd got back after the first week, it got so bad that he had to take him into urgent care.  They got meds for him and he recovered well, but it was super stressful for Todd. We joke about the difficulty in “re-entry” after a trip and this one was a little extra.  So much so that he felt like he didn’t want to do another big trip for a long time because it didn’t feel worth it.

Silas and I tandem Jumping ^

We had several things that happened in Hawaii that also made things difficult.  First of all, I was disappointed and embarrassed by the fact that I didn’t realize that when I booked Richard and Linda a one bedroom instead of a two bedroom how different the rooms were.  Most timeshares don’t have a huge difference in view and size between 1 and 2 bedrooms, but apparently this one was different.  Our room had a gorgeous ocean view.  They had a second story view of the parking lot and another building.  We had huge rooms and theirs was tiny by comparison.  They were SUCH good sports and had good attitudes, spending a lot of the vacation teasing me about our “castle” and their “dungeon”, but we shared meals up in ours and sat on our lanai together almost every night.  I was thankful that despite my poor planning, they still enjoyed themselves.

There were also relational issues, one in particular between the younger girls and another between one child and I.  We had a hard conversation that was both hurtful and frustrating.  I made a huge mom-error halfway through the week, with this child though, and somehow this error by God’s grace, helped restore our relationship. They not only forgave me, but to my relief,  good naturedly teased me about it the rest of the time and despite our long “discussion” earlier in the week, the last few days with them were full of laughter, and good memories.  

In addition to this there was the whole “time away with kids is a trip not a vacation” and though Todd and I had a good time, it wasn’t like our anniversary trip to the Columbia River Gorge where we got to focus more on each other.

We did get to take a date to Big Beach and I wanted to explore and see Little Beach on the other side as well, only accessible by hiking over a hill.  There is a picture in a guidebook that I have of the coast, from the air, and the hill you climb to get from one beach to another.  I’d been gazing at that picture in longing for the past several years wishing to explore.  

I couldn’t wait to go and as Todd and I made our way over the hill from one beach to the other, was a big sign as you go across that says, “no nudity” but to our chagrin and my laughter, as we crossed over the hill and made our way down to the beach we quickly retraced our steps realizing that we would not fit in at Little Beach.  

I laughed so hard and Todd was just uncomfortable but it was neither glamourous or beautiful.  In fact, there were very few people under the age 40 or or 50 and even though we only had a glimpse, it was definitely not an experience I would want to repeat.  Unseeing things like a lot of wrinkles and tattoos on senior citizens in their birthday suits is impossible.  I laughed all the way back!

The younger girls and I had fun exploring while Todd relaxed at the condo, and it was so fun to see their wonder, despite my mistake of taking them on a too-long hike to Iva’s consternation and there were a few tears.  However, at the end of it she was so exhausted she was laughing at everything so I redeemed myself by joking around with her.  

I did have a wonderful time exploring with the girls and we also did a few things together as a family like visiting the Maui Ocean Center, celebrating Grandma Linda’s birthday in Lahaina and of course pool time.  

Maggie and I did the Road to Hana together and we both loved the beautiful places we got to see.  One of the things we did involved a spectacular cliff jump (my favorite thing to do) and the prettiest scenery in a truly remote spot not too well known to tourists that ended up being my favorite part of the trip. I had read about it, and had been wishing and dreaming about it for almost 5 years.  

Todd and I didn’t go to this when we took the Road to Hana for our 15th wedding anniversary several years ago and when I took the younger girls on this trip, we ended up doing other things.  But Maggie and I chanced to find someone going there as we parked along the road and tried to figure out how to find it. I truly don’t think we would have found it without asking them if we could follow them.  It was gorgeous and the combination of lush, beautiful, slightly dangerous and yet peaceful was my favorite thing I did and experiencing it with Maggie was the cherry on top.  We jumped together at different spots.  

I was also thankful that we were able to arrange with the caregivers that when Maggie and Silas arrived on Maui in the middle of our time, the following day Todd and the girls didn’t have to leave until around 4:00 in the afternoon, so we got a full morning and afternoon as a family with all 4 kids together with the Grandparents.  

We went out for breakfast and as everyone was chatting and enjoying themselves, Maggie looked over at me and said, “Mom are you crying!?!”  I had to admit that I had tears in my eyes and a lump in my throat, feeling both so grateful to God for this gift, of being all together despite the brevity, and simultaneously wishing it could last longer.  We did a family photo shoot late that morning and the kids went swimming at the resort pool before I left to take Todd, Lucie and Iva to the airport.

Overall we did have a beautiful time.  We spent time shopping in Lahaina with Richard and Linda and enjoyed ice cream with the older kids.  We cliff jumped black rock with some of our cousins who happened to be there at the same time,  and went back later, just Silas and Maggie and I and did some more, including Silas and I tandem jumping which I loved.  My mom had a wonderful time as well and we left with our hearts full of thankfulness for a beautiful trip.

But at the same time I knew that God was allowing some of these hiccups to remind me that no matter how much planning I do, no matter how thrifty I am, no matter if we are in the most beautiful place in the world, there a

re still relationship issues, there are still circumstantial difficulties, sick kids and He is the one who satisfies.  Paradise is not always paradise.  No amount of planning can make things perfect on earth.  No idol is ever going to meet up or match with HIs goodness.  I am thankful for His “good gift” he gave us on this trip but I also knew that He was reminding me that the Giver is more important than the gift.  

It is interesting because the other time I cried during the trip was when we attended church together on Easter Sunday.  The service was nice and it was outdoors and lovely, but as soon as the music started, I found myself swallowing tears.  There is something about being in the house of God and remembering that He is the one who truly satisfies.

That said,  we don’t have a lot of trips planned for next year as a result of some of the stress and hassle, and everyone (except me of course) is a little gun shy about even thinking about it at this point, which makes me sad, but reminds me that God is in control of the future and I need to continue to hold things I love with an open hand and heart.  

I am thankful for His reminders of this to me to not make idols out of his good gifts, and to trust Him for what the future holds.  He loves me so much that He wants to be first and I am thankful for this reminder in my life and thankful for this long awaited good gift of enjoying Hawaii with my family.